Limbaugh Does Sit-Down Comedy

For those of us who find Rush Limbaugh more offensive than funny, who have encountered his hoards of dumbass “Ditto-heads” with double-digit IQs, and who have suspected for years that there’s some weird kind of connection between butt-boils, Oxy-induced head cheese and those 4+ hour Viagra erections (what a Rush… hahaha), his graduation into the rarified realm of genuine comedy was a little bit surprising.

I mean, it’s not like his fans are capable of getting the joke, even though it is aimed at their sub-sub-average ‘least common denominator’ and all. But there it is on the June 24th transcript in all its deliberately offensive glory. Which those of us with more than two brain cells to rub together will certainly appreciate in the midst of our grief for George Carlin’s recent death.

It’s sort of a parody of the many talking heads out there on ‘real’ TV who keep race-baiting but aren’t quite sure how to do so without ending up like Imus. About 2/3 down the transcript page you get the full act, Limbaugh and his fictional sidekick character Bo Snerdley (“Official Obama Criticizer) on whether Obama’s got any “slave blood” in his veins. My favorite clip…

SNERDLEY: Yes, yes. And! I have Irish blood coursing through my vanes (sic) as well. It shows up under the microscope. All of them, different ones, they show up.

RUSH: You’ve actually had your blood microscoped?

SNERDLEY: Yes, and they identified the slave blood.

RUSH: This was part of the process?

SNERDLEY: Yes. We identified the different segments.

RUSH: True. Why did you…?

SNERDLEY: African blood, there. Slave blood, there. Indian blood, there.

RUSH: There is separate slave blood hemoglobin that you can see in the microscope?

*SNERDLEY: Yes. They’re chained differently. Leave that alone.

RUSH: Had no idea. And the Irish blood?

*SNERDLEY: Oh, yes! It’s a little bit more red at the top.

It goes on and on, of course, but I’ve gotta admit that Snerdley’s punch lines (signified by asterisks in this short excerpt) are deadly. So while we know Limbaugh’s too old and fat and crippled by his butt-boils (that’s how he got out of service during Vietnam) to do actual stand-up comedy, maybe he and Snerdley can do a stand-up/sit-down routine on the circuit. It would definitely be a step up the ‘success’ ladder for Limbaugh, and let’s face it…

The country could use a good laugh.

So check out the link at Rushlimbaugh.com and be amazed at the possible value of turning to true humor after having been such a hate-mongering jerk for so many years.

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